Do You Know How to Show Versus Tell?

Since I don't often write fiction, I might not be the best person to describe the Show, Don't Tell principle of writing. It is, nevertheless, an important writing skill to hone. It is as important to hone as learning to write in active tense rather than passive or past tense. 

Just 12 years ago, or so I was tutoring a high school student. I was teaching him based on old rules. I taught him to embellish his sentences with flowery adjectives. I didn't know doing so was now passe. No, we are not to say she donned a very lovely dress--(very and words that end in ly are now to be axed.) 
The point is, that we need to keep up with new writing rules. 

So back to the show versus tell example. The manuscript I'd looked at for a woman had less than intriguing descriptions. One example is this:

Bob picked up his toothbrush, squeezed toothpaste onto it and began to brush his teeth. Then he turned off the tap, the lights, and made his way to his room. He pulled the blanket off the bed and climbed in. He was troubled because his wife was so belligerent to him and had cheated on him.   

I only saw part of the manuscript, so I'm not sure if this detail is important. However, it feels like too much detail, and the author is telling what took place rather than showing it.

I'm not sure the sample showed anything about Bob's character or appearance or that he was brushing his teeth was important to move the story along. I mean, don't we all do this at night to get ready for bed? Isn't it a little insulting to the reader to give so many obvious details? Could she not as easily have said: Bob got ready for bed?

Again, I'm not an experienced fiction writer, but I'll give it a go at a rewrite:

Bob gripped his toothbrush tightly, brushing his teeth rapidly before making his way to the empty bed, "Why did she have to cheat on me? What do I do now? I can't stay at my brother's house forever."

The single bed seemed small, the room dark and lonely. The thin flannel blanket would be Bob's only solace as he processed the newly uncovered truths. 

Again, I'm not a fiction writer so not sure I nailed it, but the second format explains the same series of events as the first, but in a way that unfolds the story a little more. Thoughts? 

Are you Open to Learning?

I recently reviewed a manuscript from an aspiring writer. We've all been there--in the early exciting stages of creating. We invest our emotions into our work, believing it's ready for publication, only to be told there's still room for improvement. 

As writers, though we aspire to become better, the journey towards mastery often takes time and continuous effort.

It's easy to become overly attached to our work, not necessarily because it's outstanding and ready for publication, but rather due to the substantial time and effort we've invested in it. We argue, our heart was in the right place. And Christian writers argue, but this is what God told me to write. 

But we exist in the real world and it's important to become aware that even if we've poured our entire being into a project, it's important to stay open to criticism and correction.

The individual I mentioned earlier appeared to believe that her three manuscripts were ready for publishing. From my brief interactions with her, it was clear she was defensive about her work.

Attachment Issues 

I understand where she was coming from. One book I was writing for stay-at-home moms I began when my children were just entering school. That was twenty-five years ago now. I worked on it off and on over years and submitted it to a publisher eventually. But it was rejected. I revamped it and put out a shorter self-published ebook version a few years ago and I haven't sold one!

I invested so much of myself into that project. I was sure it was part of God's plan for me to get it out there for women who were at-home moms as I had been for many years! 

After dedicating countless unpaid hours to the manuscript as I had, my natural inclination was to desire tangible returns. Whether it was seeking acceptance from an editor or publisher or opting for self-publishing on platforms like Amazon, my ultimate goal has been to earn royalties and see the fruits of my labor acknowledged. 

The Value of Critiques

The reality for a writer is that rejections and critiques are part of the journey. (And don't get me started on reviews. It's best for my self-esteem that I don't read reviews.)

To become a good writer requires ongoing learning and multiple edits of our work. We can always learn from other writers--not just from their books, but from their input in online support groups or through local meetups. There are also online articles and ebooks on the topic of writing that can help us learn and grow in our writing. 

Tough Skin 

My web content articles are always edited/critiqued before I am allowed to offer them for sale. I've had to develop tough skin. Sometimes the editors have been off base. Sometimes an editor points out a stylistic change which I don't agree is necessary, it's just what they prefer. I become frustrated in those cases. So, when I get that type of feedback, I often walk away for a bit of time and face it when I'm ready to. 

Where my eBooks are concerned, I'm a little more timid about putting them past another set of eyes. I once paid $500 to have a manuscript critiqued. In the end, the comments were valuable, but at the time I felt massacred. I scrapped the entire manuscript and started over eventually self-publishing it on Amazon.

Are you prepared to take feedback on your writing? Or are you convinced you are stellar enough? 

Will you dedicate yourself to ongoing learning so you can improve your writing?

Do You Have Role Models?

Do you have role models in your life?

Every now and then you meet someone who inspires you.  It may be their smile, their friendly personality, their demeanor, their thoughtfulness, their spiritual faith...

Role models can be picked up through books too. It's amazing how certain authors have impacted my life personally. I like to follow them on social media to stay inspired. I like to buy more of their books as they come out. 

We are always drawn to others who have something we'd like to emulate or who impact us in positive ways.

Social networking and the Internet are great ways to pick up mentors or role models that can come right into your home virtually at any time. 

It's good to keep a few good models in our relationship satchel even if we only admire them from afar, through the pages of a book, or through their blog posts.  When we get side-tracked they will inspire us.  When we are lost, visiting them in person or virtually helps us feel "found" again.

Who do you have on your list?

Reference Your Work

I'm popping in here to write about a thought I wanted to share. 

When I had a book critique done, the editor doing the critique criticized me for having dictionary definitions in my work. She said it was the sign of immature writing. I took them out. 

What do think about that comment? 

The decision to include dictionary definitions is entirely yours. In the end, the impact of integrating definitions hinges on how seamlessly they enhance the overall quality of your writing.  However, it is advisable, at the very least, to enclose direct quotes in quotations and provide proper citation or footnotes to acknowledge the sources.

The same goes for Bible verses. But be aware, some of today's publishers prefer writers paraphrase the meaning of a Bible verse rather than fill their manuscript with direct quotes. 

If you do quote a Bible verse word for word, please also apply the proper quotation marks and add the reference.  

Here are examples of how to show Bible verse quotations (notice the brackets and the punctuation). In the ebook that included these, in the opening remarks, I posted this statement: 

Scripture quotations marked are taken from THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission.  All rights reserved worldwide.

Whenever I used an alternate version of the Bible, I added the version in the quote as in this example: 

 

“And your ears shall hear a word behind you,

saying, “This is the way, walk in it, when you turn

to the right or when you turn to the left”

(Is. 30:21 ESV).

 "As the heavens are higher than the earth,

so are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts” (Isa 55:9).

Edit Until...

Writing is the easy part. You sit at a computer or pull out your journal and spew your thoughts. But if you want to share or publish your writing, editing is necessary. Blog posts can get away with a little less work, but articles take more editing. 

When I edit something I've thrown together, I first try to decide where I to go with it. It has to serve a purpose. It has to ask and answer a question. There needs to be flow. The sequence has to make sense. 

(That being said, I've gone back over some things I've written and published and much later see it could have flowed better. We are always a work in progress.)  

Cut Words

Cutting unnecessary words is an important edit. When I write eBooks, not only do I cut the unnecessary words I notice, I go to lists of words I've saved that professional editors say to cut (you can find lists online). I do a word search on various words or phrases and cut them out drastically.

It's always a good idea to give yourself time between edits even if it is simply minutes. 

I edit an article, leave it to work on another, and return to it later. I do this on and off until I can read an article through without making a change. Then I know it's ready. 

Of course, the perfectionist in most writers keeps seeing more to change. When this becomes problematic, I just call it quits. I say it's good enough, and I send it in to the editors.